When We Women Make Time for Ourselves

This was supposed to be a Wordless Wednesday post, but I have words, dammit, so I'm using 'em :)

With Mom in Mind: A Celebration of Health, Food and Self.

Here are a few still shots from one of our sponsors, CreativeSoul Photography.

We got a backflip/B-girl backspin-inspiring write-up by the beautiful ladies (Sandra and Chante') over at Be.Beautifully.Well!

Renee over at CutieBootyCakes is rockin' the shirt she snagged from one of our sponsors,Tiffany Campbell of I Love My Temple Yoga + Wellness Center!

Shelley Chapman of Naturi Beauty Concepts—my cohort in the planning of this event—did a fabulous review of the event over at her blog!
*ExecuTuri Lifestyle Events*

A special "Happy to meet you!" greeting to Krystal Grant, the lucky winner of the MyBrownBaby With Mom in Mind giveaway!  

I'm STILL over-the-moon excited about being able to share and learn with my Atlanta sisters!!  Please join the Execumama Facebook page for details on all-things-Execumama.

Nurturing a Community of Self: WIth Mom in MInd

Let's face it; you—and likely a vast majority of the women you know—feel overwhelmed, overworked, and outright depleted from the level of energy it takes to manage our lives in a semi-sane, somewhat effective way.  I'm thinking I don't want to tell that story over and over, and that there IS a way to walk my path as woman/wife/mother/entrepreneur/volunteer and still feel energized, healthy, and ready to embrace the blessing that is my life.

According to the National Institute of Mental Health,  anxiety disorder, panic disorder, and depression, occur in higher rates in women than in men.  Add to that the fact that in many households, women are the primary care-givers of their children, and you can start to see why these sorts of comments ran rampant at With Mom in Mind this past Saturday.

"I'm running on 'E' by the time six o' clock rolls around!"

"I need to remember how to make time for myself since it's been so long!"

"Girl, my house falls apart if I leave for too long, so I just avoid it when I can!"

That is no way to feel or to live, and that's precisely why I feel that these types of events are a NECESSARY part of our lives as busy women.  This past Saturday, Shelley Chapman of Naturi Beauty Concepts and I did our versions of shouting it from the rooftops that women everywhere deserve to nourish, nurture, and grow their fullest versions of SELF! We did that through With Mom in Mind, and fortunately, we had a great group of women ready and willing to receive and give their time and energy to us and most importantly to themselves!

We got to meet up with some of our blog family, some of whom we'd never met face to face, as well as connecting with new fellow Execumamas and Naturi Beauties, and I tell you, the energy in the room was goosebump-inducing!

Our guides were a part of an elite group of women whose work directly impacts the daily work we do as women and mothers, and I'm most proud of the fact that I was able to create another avenue through which they could shed light via their particular brands of sunshine--and SHINE they did!

Our yoga instructor, Tiffany Campbell of I Love My Temple Yoga & Wellness Center here in Atlanta, had us quiet, focused, and paying attention to our bodies, and we needed/appreciated that.  Tiffany was so gracious as some of us moaned and almost cried as she gently talked us through a series of poses.  It was wonderful, and every single one of us knew we needed Tiffany's session.  The soreness in my arms today remind me that there is much work to be done, and the mental picture in my mind of Tiffany's sculpted arms serves as a great reminder that mamas can be/stay HOT and healthy too!! #HotMamaSociety

Next in our line-up was best-selling author, educator and speaker, Christine Martinello, one of many Queen Momagers! I'm telling you, she had such heart-warming anecdotes and practical tips for us that I know she was exactly who needed to be there at this inaugural workshop.  She's a wife and a mother first, and I love that, despite how accomplished, widely recognized, and fantastic Christine is, she's so humble and welcoming that you just want to sit and chat with her for hours on end.  She donned a tiara, a smile and a wealth of resources, and we all graciously soaked in the sunshine Christine brought into the room.  #QueenMomager

Then came the oooh's and aaah's as Kahran Hill of CreativeSoul Photography, the talents behind this project passed around photos and talked to us about ways to capture the essence of our families on camera.  Kahran and her partner, Reg, are masters of their craft, and I can say this because they kept my children happy, occupied and smiling during a long outdoor photoshoot.  Can we say #MagicalPhotographersWithSkills??

Then, the finale was just what our bellies were waiting for--the blessing that is getting to taste the food of  a chef who is passionate about her work.  Shelley Chapman of Naturi Beauty Concepts had on sipping on mint-cucumber yumminess and then indulging in swordfish kebobs with couscous, and then a sinfully delicious helping of a poundcake/almonds/mandarin oranges/whole buncha other good stuff dessert!

Overall, I am so excited about this series of workshops, and the fact that I get to meet so many wonderful women who are determined to remember themselves, their health, and their happiness throughout their journeys is nothing shy of BLISSFULLY RIGHT, and I accept the gift of their company, your company at the next With Mom in Mind.

Pictures and video to come...

World Fitness Day: I AM SO THERE!

Click the image of the video to watch

NOTE TO SELF *Hands clasped, eyes closed*: I will work to be as fit, fly and active in my community as Jane Fonda when I get to be her age! Repeat it, and mean it!

Okay, you saw how my first-born got gansta with her demands that parents and children get more conscious about choosing the foods they eat, and increasing the amount of exercise they do each day, right?  Well, DITTO, because we try hard at home to maintain some semblance of balance in our diets and physical activities, and I'm so happy she and her sister GET it the way they do!

As a parent, I never quite know for sure whether my children are really taking in what I'm saying versus what I'm doing, knowwhatImean?  I exercise at least twice a week, but I also LOVE brownies, and my girls know this, for it is FACT! Kris and I do our best to show that they can enjoy themselves as long as they stay responsible, not just to external obligations, but also to their temples as well.  This is why I'm so excited about WORLD FITNESS DAY, Jane Fonda's project, because it affords me yet another opportunity to walk the talk!

When is fitness NOT relevant in our lives? Exaaaaactly!  And the deal-sweetener for me is the fact that a portion of proceeds from the event will go to benefit the Georgia Campaign for Adolescent Pregnancy Prevention, of which Jane Fonda is Founder and Chairperson.  

So, here's the deal on the What, Why, and How of World Fitness Day:

For an overview of World Fitness Day, CLICK HERE.

For how to participate, CLICK HERE.

Want to know about the Concert and Schedule of Events? CLICK HERE.

Watch the live UStream by joining in HERE.

If you decide to join the likes of Billy Blanks and Jane's other celeb pals, @ me on Twitter (@Execumama) so we can hi-five each other for caring about our bodies! Be sure to use the hashtag #worldfit while you tweet!




Disclosure: I am receiving no monetary compensation for this post, and will receive free admission and a media pass to the event. 

Kindergarten & The Food Revolution

Gotta love a 6 year old's perspective on things. I know I sound like an old fart 
when I say this, but I tell you, these 2.0 children are off-the-charts!

As usual, I am grateful to my daughters for paying attention and being bold
enough to make sure their voices are heard.

How Will I Know When It's Time For Separate Rooms?

Well, got any answers for me?  I'm stumped.

I'd never 100 % bought into the theory that my mommy instincts would just kick in and I'd simply know when to do stuff.  Seriously, ask Kris.  I had him on guard to "take his baby and walk away without fear of being chased by me" when we had our first.  Plus, when Marley was about 6 weeks old, I got brave and attempted to clip her fingernails and snipped a piece of her finger! That child wailed so loud and with such conviction, I swore she was telling me that I sucked and that I should leave her while there was still time! The only person crying harder than that baby at the time, was me!  Maaaan, that was a rough time!  Thankfully, I breastfed her and her sister, and that helped us form a bond, which also offered me the possibility that I had some use in their lives other than being their carrier and birth vessel for the previous 9 months.  The point is though,  I was convinced that whatever maternal instinct thingies my mom and the other amazing women in my life spoke of, whizzed right on by me, and with good reason.

I've had a few run-ins with maternal instincts since Marley's birth, and now, two daughters and 6 years later, I think I may in fact have a few stitches of it laced about my infrastructure.  However, the few sprinkles I can identify have parted like the Red Sea when I asked myself when would be a good time for our 6 and 4 year olds to get separate rooms.

When's a good time?  Is it when the oldest gets to the double digits?
What about when they fight at nighttime when they should be sleeping?
I.Don't.Know.This.Stuff.

Help me, Mamas!

Three Questions: My New Monday Meme

Photo Credit

What better way to counter the effects of the Monday Blues than with a walk down the block of all things juicy, useful, and blush-inducing!

Since this blog is not just about me, but more so about us, and our journey through Execumamahood, I'm always thinking of ways to exchange information to see just how much we can learn from each other via my posts.  I like to think of each post as a handshake of sorts, and a way of exchanging information and learning about you/me through our experiences.  This week in particular, I'm giving you the shoulder tap to ask about something that I use to keep it "spicy".  Yep, it's exactly what you're thinking, too!  This particular "spice" brings much flavor, and it's welcomed amidst the beautiful chaos of the babies, the businesses, and the overall grind.  Yeppers, with this, the hubs and I are in constant practice on how to retain a sense of connection, not just to each other, but to our individual selves.

I've been exploring a particular, ahem...shall we say, "school of thought" over the past year, and the term, though typically associated with sex, actually means so much more.  The word to which I'm referring, you ask? TANTRA.

Yep, say it with me: TANTRA.  Now, this is the part where we get to learn from each other.  I've listed three questions below, and I'd love to hear your thoughts.  Each Monday, I'll do another Three Questions post, and maybe even follow-ups based on the response.

I'm curious to find out how many of my fellow Execumamas are studying this particular form of enlightenment.  Aren't you?

On TANTRA...

1. What does Tantra mean to you?
2.  Is this a topic of interest for you? If so, why?
3.  Have you harnessed tantric energy for use in any areas of your life?

Photography with (Creative) Soul!

Dear CreativeSoul Photography,

You. Are. The. Bees. Knees.

Raise your hand if your family photos consist of the less-than-exciting in-studios at your local Big Box store.  C'mon, get 'em up! I've been there, and it wasn't pretty!  When my girls were about 2 and 1, we went to a Big Box to take photos, and even though I went in with ammo (by way of my mom and mom-in-law), it was r-o-u-g-h, dude!  When we were done, we looked like we had tried to escape from Jamaica on foot with the girls on our backs--no joke!

Since then, save for the Essence photo shoot, there have been no, and I mean NO professional (would Big Box store studios be considered professional?) photos taken with the offspring.  Why, you ask? Because it's time-consuming, cookie-cutter, and basically Snooze City! I love to look at photos that capture personality, and make me feel all running-in-the-field-la-la-laa-ish, and I've just never gotten that from Sears or Walmart or whoever.

{Insert Super-hero photographers music here}  

ENTER CreativeSoul Photography!

Let's just say that after our session last Sunday, I am officially sold on the "Modern photography for the modern family" motto! Kris and I are so thankful they reached out to us to do this project!

We even got a vision board to map out and approve the look in advance! They picked the clothes, the location, and even sent packages for the girls that included requests for self-portraits, "about me" surveys, and a what-to-expect rundown of the shoot.  Can we say SCORE! 

Oh, and did I mention that they totally know stuff? I mean relevant stuff that momarazzi can use to conduct their own photo shoots in between sessions with CreativeSoul.  If you're in Atlanta, come chat with owners Kahran and Reggie at With Mom in Mind, and learn some great tips for stress-free photo shoots with the kiddos! Man, I love my sponsors!

Richards Family from CreativeSoul Photography on Vimeo.

When Flying Dropkicks Are Rather Appropriate...

This post is about comparisons.  Specifically comparing one child to another.  I'm asking for your experience and perspective on this one, because once again, the conversations need to be had.

Our oldest daughter, Marley, is quite the chatterbox.  She has a big personality and so she grabs attention.  On more than one occasion, I've had moms say to me—in the presence of their own child, mind you—that they wish their child was more like Marley! Un-frikkin-believable.  What's worse, one mom even said directly to her child, "See, you should be more like her!" Um, the kid couldn't have been more than 4 years old.  I was livid. It took everything in me not to ask her if she was on the purest cocaine, and if she would like it if I asked her why she chose to procreate if she couldn't think enough of her child NOT to put her out there in such a tactless way.

Do we have the right to decide what personality our children should have?  I'm just saying! I know we all get to parent however we see fit, and I'm no shrink, but I'm thinking emotional abuse is running all up and through a household where a child is made to feel less than because s/he isn't like someone else.

Yeah, let's just say, I had to play nice in front of the kiddos in that above-referenced situation, so I got on my knees, touched her child's shoulder and told her that everyone is different, and that she's perfectly okay being herself.  *Deep sigh*  NOT COOL, people! Remember the Old Jamaican Proverb post where I spoke about the way Kris and I embrace the stark differences between our daughters?  Yeah, well, I meant it (LOL!), and we are vigilant about informing the people in our "village" about how unacceptable it is to compare our daughters, particularly in their presence.

So, last week, I received an email from a fellow Execumama, and I asked her permission to get some insight from you, my insightful fellow mamas.  Here's the gist of her email:

My 2 yr old son and a my 2 yr old niece were born one day apart, and since day one they have been compared to each other. My son was a quiet, easy going baby while my niece was very much the opposite. Now, at age two, my niece is very verbal, says her alphabet, numbers, and nursery rhymes on queue and she is what most people consider "smart" for her age. My son on the other hand, doesn't talk as much, is really laid back most of the time, and performing on queue doesn't seem to be his thing. In addition, my niece attends school so she's in a learning environment every day, whereas my son is at home with me. I make it a point to do activities with him, but it's not the easiest thing when you're also trying to grow a business.  *Execumama alert!

I understand clearly that kids develop at different rates, and this is something that is even apparent among siblings. With that being said, how do you tell people to knock it off with the comparisons without being too harsh? I know it's only going to get worse as the years go by and I know if it continues, it's going to piss me off even more. Even if my son becomes a straight A student, I still want it stopped because it's not fair for either one. I really don't want to restrict the amount of time that we spend around family for this reason, but I won't allow people to use the word "slow" in any capacity when referring to my son. Besides this issue, I get along extremely well with that side of the family. 

BTW, I'm not at all concerned with my son's development, but it annoys me when people act like what someone knows at age 2 determines what they will know at age 32.

Okay, see now this is the sort of thing that takes me back to my old, less-than-polite, couldn't-give-less-of-a-shit-about-your-feelings self.  Where do people get off throwing any child, even their own, under the bus like that? I'm not feeling it. At. All.

Is there such a thing as "healthy comparison" when it comes to children?

Are parents made to feel that there child is somehow "delayed" because they're not outgoing?

Were you that child? If so, how did it affect you then and now?

GRATITUDE: Photo shoots, Flowers, & FUN!

(Click to enlarge)

Awww! Look at my little mamas all dolled up and enjoying the sunshine and scenery.  Mother Nature provided the ideal backdrop for our family photo shoot at the Atlanta Botanical Garden today--SCORE!  Like many others who've come through less than ideal circumstances, Kris and I do our best to practice the conscious act of gratitude awareness as often as we can.  Every single day offers several reasons for which we should be telling our Creator just how aware and thankful we are, and it seems like today, those reasons for gratitude came out in abundance! May I share a few of them with you?

Today, we were particularly thankful for the 81 degrees that kissed our faces and helped us finally bid a strong Bye, dammit! to Old Man Winter :)

Today, we were thankful for the professionalism of our photographers, the beautiful young couple who own and operate CreativeSoul Photography here in Atlanta.  Our last family photo shoot was exciting and fun, and today, we were reminded of just how much the four of us enjoy each other's company, and how amazingly seamless a shoot with the kiddos can be when a talented team captures us simply doing our thang!  I'll be talking more about CreativeSoul next week when we get the results of our shoot, but so far, let me just say, I am particularly thankful that they are on our list of sponsors for our mom-focused workshop, With Mom in Mind!

Today, I had an opportunity to watch our daughters laugh and play, and though laughing and playing are their full-time jobs, today in particular, I felt more blessed than ever to be a part of their lives, and to observe them in a series of happy moments.

Do you get like that sometimes?  Do you see your children doing their everyday happy kiddos stuff and just become almost overwhelmed with wonderful emotions?

Okay, before I get out my Kleenex, let me just close out by reminding you to GIVE THANKS.  When I remind you, I remind myself too, and sometimes, we need to be reminded.

Can't wait to share the details of the shoot with you! The photos in this post were taken with our camera phones, so pardon the bootleggedness :)  Anyhoo, Have a WONDERFUL week, and go ahead and pinkie-swear with me right now that you'll remember to practice conscious acts of GRATITUDE?